Wish I'd Said It

Weeds are flowers too - once you get to know them.

- A. A. Milne

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

David Letterman, Nicole Kidman & Plastic Surgery - Oh My!

A few months ago, after a several-year absence, I started watching the Late Show with David Letterman again. I’ve watched Dave since his earliest days on NBC over three decades ago. I stopped for a while because I wasn’t really enjoying him or the show anymore. He seemed bitter, cynical and bored.

If you felt the same way, try giving him another shot. He’s mellowed since becoming a father five years ago. He’s having fun again and it shows. The cynicism has been tempered and he’s almost - dare I say it? - warm.

Anyhow, the other night he had Nicole Kidman on. I’d always considered her a very pretty woman and a good actress who wasn’t bright enough to avoid marrying Tom Cruise. Well, she might still be a good actress but I don’t think she’s all that pretty anymore. And apparently her IQ hasn’t climbed any because it seems she’s joined the ranks of those Hollywood types who’ve done Something Wrong to their face. Her skin is too darn tight. She appears to be in the early stages of Joan Rivers-itis.

Dave of course, gentleman that he is, extolled her beauty several times and if you didn’t know him, you’d take him at his word. But as a longtime Dave watcher I can tell you with some degree of confidence that he was as taken aback as I was.

Although not as drastic yet (after all, she’s younger) Ms Kidman seems to have followed in the footsteps of Dolly (The Joker) Parton, Mary Tyler Moore and a host of others who have done appalling things to their facial features.

I Googled “nicole kidman plastic surgery” and got a bunch of hits. One of which led me to a site called awfulplasticsurgery.com.

Holy crap.

That’s one scary site. Don’t go there. I mean, we all know about Michael Jackson but believe it or not - there’s worse.

And mostly these abominations are done in an attempt to preserve some vestige of youthful beauty. It’s bad enough when half the women in Hollywood have plastic cantaloupes attached to their chests but now a bunch of them also have swollen lips and drum-tight facial skin.

I blame Angelina Jolie. Seemingly, every other woman in the entertainment racket wants to be like her: huge pouty lips and a skinny frame except for chest melons.

But in a few years she’s going to start looking more “mature.” Will she go the botox/surgery/liposuction route, you think? I hope not but won’t be surprised if she does.

Add unethical plastic surgeons to the blame list. They exploit people with poor self-esteem and feed their insecurities. They betray their Hippocratic oath. They are doing harm.

Some of you know I’ve had a bit of thing for Susan Sarandon since 1970. It’s no big deal really. A few pictures on the walls. Pillow cases with her likeness. A couple of death threats to that Tim Robbins guy. A restraining order or two.

Anyhow, she’s a woman in the public eye who is aging gracefully and naturally. Susie (close, personal friends can call her that) has lines and wrinkles but still looks fabulous.

Remember Jessica Tandy? She was a lovely woman throughout her long life, no less so at 84 than she was at 24, 44, or 64. A hundred wrinkles couldn’t detract from her beauty.

I’ve got one more group of people to blame - fathers. A father’s job is to convince his daughter that she’s beautiful and will always remain so. Fathers need to take the Nicole Kidmans of the world aside and give them a shake. Make them face reality:

You were born beautiful. That’s a gift. So is a long, healthy life. But that life leaves marks. The ones that matter are those tracked upon your soul, not your face. Leave them be.

But I gotta confess I’m glad this father had sons. I bet Dave is too.


Hilary said...

I'm glad I have sons too. And someone who feels the way you do. And Photoshop. ;)

Leah J. Utas said...

Beautiful words, Frank. I wish more women understood that and that more men felt the way you do.
Lines and wrinkles add character, they do not detract from beauty.
A women with a wrinkly neck and taut smooth face is hideous and sad. Seems to me I saw a pic of Candice Bergen with that.
Bodies wear out. Denial gets you nowhere.

Ray Veen said...

Very well stated, Frank. And I feel the same way.

I'm gonna send my wife over here so she can see what I've been trying to tell her for the last couple years.

Frank Baron said...

Oh, you don't need Photoshop Hilary. Unless...can you do something about those recent pictures that make it look like I gained 20 pounds? Trick of the light and all that - but still....;)

Hear-hear Leah. :)

BPV, I've seen the pics of your family and they're a great-looking group - including your wife. Amazing isn't it, how even some very attractive people can look in the mirror and only see flaws?

Chi said...

You put the website addy up, and you said don't go there; you know we went there.

Double Kudos and a Gold Star for the picture word "chest melons".

Reb said...

One would think after Phyllis Diller & Joan Rivers that women (in the public eye especially) would know better. Did they not hear & laugh at all the jokes like the rest of us?

Frank Baron said...

Christopha, I knew some would go there but I deliberately didn't make it a clickable link. Thanks for the kudos. :)

Reb, you gotta wonder sometimes don't you? Thanks for stopping by. :)

Michelle H. said...

I still don't understand why celebs even bother at doing this anymore. What with airbrushing in magazine photos and everybody having photoshop, the nip and tuck is done right on the computer screen. Curse the warped celebrity images tainting our minds!

Anonymous said...

Fatherhood and a heart attack did mellow old Dave out for the better. Kudos to those celebrity women who haven't caved in to false pressure.

Count me in as another happy to be parenting boys instead of girls. It's a rough world out there.

Frank Baron said...

Michelle, it's gotta be in the expectation (hope) they'll be nominated for an Emmy or Oscar and have to show up in the flesh.

It sure is KC. Thanks for stopping by. :)

Stace said...

Yes, I loathe the very idea of cosmetic surgery - barring having some awful deformity fixed up or something!! But looking normal, or even slightly better than normal, is not a deformity.

Anonymous said...

What a great post! I agree about Susan S. she has actually aged naturally... Not a natural thing in Hollywood.

Kappa no He said...

My 65-year old mother-in-law was just here telling me she bought a three-hundred dollar machine that injects nano-water into her skin to get rid of wrinkles. Riiiight.

Dianne said...

how did I miss this!?

what a wonderful post

I think you're pretty cool

Frank Baron said...

You're right Stace. Of course, being a pretty 25-year-old lends a different perspective than a gravity-challenged 55-year-old. ;)

Thanks Meredith. I have an instant soft spot in my heart for anyone who agrees with me. :)

What a silly notion Terrie! Hehehe. Umm...let me know if it works.... ;)

Thanks Dianne. Flattery will get you everywhere. :)

Anonymous said...

Just found your site and love your take on plastic surgery. Just had to comment about Susan Sarandon. I was sitting across from her in an intimate Soho restaurant five or so years ago and I think she is radiant, in a normal human way. She's much more petite than I realized, both in stature and frame. She was at a table with several other women, having dinner, and I was able to watch her easily from a short distance. She appeared to be (much to my satisfaction) just as lovely on the inside as she is on the outside. So, Frank, you can happily dream on about Susan! She's worth it.

Frank Baron said...

Thanks for that inside scoop Deborah.

Now, if only we could do something about that Tim Robbins guy....

Thanks for the visit and kind words. :)

Althea said...

Definitely. Agreed.

Frank Baron said...

If you agree Althea, I know it's Gospel. :)

Ladyluck said...

Excellent advice to fathers, but the same goes for mothers of daughters. I tell all three of mine (ages 8, 8, and 10) that there is no hair color that could look better than what they were born with. While it is fun to experiment with things like hair color, and I'm sure they will someday, I am trying to teach them to like what they have when they someday choose to try something different, and make the choice for fun, not because they hate what they have. By the way, I am a high school teacher, but spend some time at the grammar school my four children attend. Boys, as well as girls, need to be reminded how beautiful they are in their natural state. The messages that companies are sending today are aimed at boys, too. Kids of both sexes are dying their hair in elementary school. It isn't that rare and I live in a rural area, not a big city.

Thanks for a great post!

Frank Baron said...

Thanks for your comments Lisa.

But how about we tell our sons they're handsome instead of beautiful? ;)

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