Wish I'd Said It

Weeds are flowers too - once you get to know them.

- A. A. Milne

Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Blog Spiffication (#199)

“Your blog looks really old and tired.” Hilary’s voice was flat, matter-of-fact. “Then again, I suppose-”

“I know what you’re going to say.”

“-it suits you.”

“Very funny. So funny, I forgot to laugh.”

She’s not the only one who can deliver a zinger.

“How the heck can something as newfangled as blogging be ‘old and tired?’ I mean, computers have only been around for a few years and blogging for what - maybe five or six? Wringer washing machines now - they’re old and tired-looking. If I had a wringer washing machine, I’d probably invest in a new one. Almost for sure. People have had their entire arms crushed by those things. Right up to the shoulder. They should be banned.”

But she would not be sidetracked.

“If you switch to the new format, which, by the way, is no longer really new because EVERYONE else switched two years ago, you can choose from a huge variety of looks and it’s easy to do things like incorporate your own banner and personalize the appearance. Plus there’s new tools to make the whole blogging process less of a pain.”

“How much they pay you to shill for them?”

That earned me The Look.

(An aside for guys only. You womenfolk skip this bit. No, seriously, skip this paragraph. Brad Pitt is in the next one. Honest. Go look...Okay, they’re gone. All guys know, and many fear, The Look. It is disdainful and meant to wither. The trick is to not make eye contact. Just look at her nose and you’ll be fine. To be on the safe side, I always only ever look at Hilary’s nose, no matter what’s being discussed.)

Anyway, that’s pretty much how the conversation went a few months ago. As those of you who’ve been reading me for a while know - I don’t deal well with change. There’s a certain wrongness about change and I think I’ve figured out what it is: It’s different. And things that are different usually means there’s some learning to do. And learning is hard. Like Math.

So, I’ve been mulling this whole blog spiffication thing for several weeks now. The thing is, as I understand it, it’s like parachuting. Once you push the Blog Change Button, you’re committed. You’ve jumped off the plane and whoa buddy - that pull cord better work as advertised! It’s conceivable that every blog post I’ve ever made, every picture I’ve ever posted, will be lost in one of the Interweb’s notorious Black Holes, never to be seen again.

But what the heck, I’m gonna do it.

Not immediately, of course. Musn’t be hasty. No good ever came from rushing. No, I’ll do it in time for my next blolum, which, for those of you keeping score at home, will be #200. Surely a bicentennial needs to be marked in some special manner.

So, in a week, or two, or three, you folks will be able to see a new, improved, ultra-spiffified blog.

Or a big black hole. Which, of course, would be Hilary's fault.


Hilary said...

Hmmm so if I read you correctly, you're really saying that you're not planning another blog post/column/blolumn for a few months.. maybe years? ;)

I'm proud of you! You'll be fine.. I'll tandem jump with you the next time we're both at your computer - or mine. And there are ways to back up your blog (even though you have every post ever written via your columns).

AND that Brad Pitt guy hasn't a single thing over you.

Leah J. Utas said...

I agree. New is scary. I'd really rather hide than change. That said, I change the header photo and whatnot on mine at my whim.
Looking forward to the spiffifying.

Thumbelina said...

Well I kinda like it as it is. Sorry Hilary. It's like ... comforting. I know what to expect here and I'm not disappointed.
Bored, but not disappointed.

Sorry. Couldn't resist. Of courseI'm not bored or I wouldn't be here. :)
Nice piccy of Brad Pitt. Very nice. Hey! Why are you looking at my nose??!
Oh and don't be blaming Hilary for cock ups. Men are the masters of those. Not Hilary's fault(already.) :0)

Thumbelina said...

Just been to your other site. Good stuff on there.

Frank, tell us about Kefalonia. I'm sitting comfortably...
(Loved the father and son story btw.)

Stace said...

Thanks Hilary! :)

Frank Baron said...

Hil, I don't plan these things at all. They just happen every now and then. And I'll pretend you meant what you said about Pitt. ;)

Leah, you're probably a natural at techno-stuff. I can only hope to survive it.

Thumbelina, of COURSE you'd stick up for Hilary. You womenfolk are a tight-knit bunch. You're welcome for the pic. ;) And I really do hope to write about Kefalonia someday. Thanks for the reminder. :)

Stace, what have I told you about swallowing basketballs?!! ;) (You look great kiddo.)

Dianne said...

if you change the font, or maybe the title color - that would be one small step for blogkind and really, isn't that enough?

I adore Hilary, but I must say I find your blog comforting - in a good way

Skunkfeathers said...

Spiffify, if it's what drives you ;)

My blog's look hasn't changed in four years. Might have to do with the limited readership (or is it what I write, but I digress). But I didn't get into it for appearances.

I don't reckon you did, either.

But if you're GONNA spiffify, how's about a hot female offset to Brad?

Just sayin'...

Shammickite said...

Once you figure out how to make all these splendiforous blog changes that you are planning, please let me know how to do it!
I think my blog could do with a facelift (as could I) and I have no idea how to start. I'm terrified of losing all the hard work I've put into it over the last 3 years, but really, nobody ever goes back into previous posts so it's all sitting there unread..... so if it disappears, what the heck?

Anne C. Watkins said...

You (or was it Hilary?) inspired me. I updated my blog today! Don't faint. lol

Frank Baron said...

Dianne, I hope you find the changes easy to take. (I'll save your favourite chair by the fire.)

Skunkfeathers, there's lots of hot females right here in my comments!

Shammi, I hear all those fears and raise you a few more. I'm quite the Luddite and still turn on my computer by poking the button with a long stick. ;)

Oh Anne - you're such a kidder! You did not!

Hehe. I'll be along to take a peek. ;)

Barbara Martin said...

Despite the danger of wringer washing machines they always got clothes clearner than the machines today do.

And, I happen to like this pastel green background colour. Easy on the eyes.

Charlie said...

Frank, I'm with you. Change for the sake of change is just ... well ... change. The real question is, how will this proposed change benefit you, or more important, your audience, namely Us? (note the capital U, which indicates how important Us are). Us-- er, we really need a cost/benefit analysis.

*waits patiently* :)

Frank Baron said...

Barbara, I like it too. Maybe I'll keep the same background, if it's still available.

Charlie, I'm thinking about a buxom-women-playing-guitars motif.... ;)

Barrie said...

I have every faith that the new blog layout/look will work just fine.

Kappa no He said...

I'm sorry, did you say something Frank? I was ogling that picture of Mr. Pit.


PS I suggest a background with fish and Benny on it. That would be cool.

Frank Baron said...

Barrie, I like the way you think. :)

Terrie, I think I made a few ladies' day with that one. ;) I'll consider your suggestion but frankly, I WAS leading to a background of me in a Speedo.

Not. :)

Fabian Colossi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Fabian Colossi said...

I think some modifications here would be well accepted as long as we don't have a larger picture of the blogger. That would kinda diminish the content of the writing, wouldn't it? :

Frank Baron said...

Can't fool me Fabian. You're only here for the Brad Pitt pic. ;)

Anonymous said...

Good riddance to this lousy blog.

The Merry said...

Personally, I come here for the sparkling wit as well as the eye candy :)

The Merry said...

Okay, and the dog pictures.

Frank Baron said...

Anon, you're as astute as you are courageous. :)

Merry, you are as astute as you are undeniably brilliant, attractive and wise. :)

Anonymous said...

Like you, I concentrate on the nose, really. I only noticed Brad's nose :).

I am always terrified to change the blog unless it slips into cyberspace, but I am always glad when I am done and it WORKED. So far, so good!

Frank Baron said...

Meredith, you inspire me. Well, I hope you'll inspire me. I'm still procrastinating.... :)

Anne C. Watkins said...

Ahem....still awaiting aforementioned spiffication. *taps foot*

Like I'm always so quick to update my blog. lol

Frank Baron said...

Don't rush me now, Anne! I'm nervous enough!

Now...what does this button

Charlie said...

Based on the previous comments about a new motif, how about buxom wimmens holding a fish for Benny?

Frank Baron said...

Charlie, you're hired! ;)

Kappa no He said...

Mmmm speedo. Hey, have you seen this?


Gal writing about a barn cat gets a SEVEN-figure advance. I think you and the Ben Man deserve at least that.

Anonymous said...

Frank, I'm out in East Texas RELAXING for a change, and had to include a long overdue visit to your blog. And I knew something was up when it took longer than usual to load and I noticed it was loading up from photobucket. But...the new picture at top was worth the wait! Gorgeous! I always like the old blog, but this one is also "you"--so no complaints. ;)

Frank Baron said...

Terrie, sorry I missed this. How'd you like to be my agent? ;)

Thanks Pat. I'm glad you like it. (And I'm glad you're relaxing too.) It's always nice to see you. Hope you and yours are well. :)