Wish I'd Said It

Weeds are flowers too - once you get to know them.

- A. A. Milne

Monday, February 13, 2006

Weirdness is in the eye of the beholder.

Joanne and Unique tagged me for this meme.

The Rules: The first player of this game starts with the topic “five weird habits” and people who get tagged need to write an entry about their five weird habits as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next five people to be tagged and link to their web journals. Don’t forget to leave a comment in their blog or journal that says “You have been tagged” (assuming they take comments) and tell them to read yours.

Okay, first a couple of apologies and a disclaimer.

Sorry, but I’m gonna break one of the rules and not tag someone(s). I think this one has been making the blog rounds with lightning speed and A- I dunno who-all’s been tagged and B- I really don’t know all that many bloggers yet. So I propose a compromise. If anyone reads my list and wants to compile their own, leave me a note to that effect with your blog addy and I’ll edit my post to add it.

And I apologize to my faithful column readers who may find a couple of familiar topics in my list.

Disclaimer: I’m the most normal person I know. The only way I can come up with five (5!) weird habits is if I use stuff that others have told me is weird.

1- I prefer to start each day by taking a large mug of tea, a newspaper and my pipe up to the bathroom and read for a half-hour or so while listening to my transistor radio. I prefer not to speak with anyone or engage in any other sort of social discourse until I’m done, um...reading.

2- I like to rub people’s bums for luck.

3- I make things up all the time. (See #2.) Well, it’s not exactly true that I totally make things up. I like the elastic properties of reality. So every now and then I bend, twist, and/or stretch it. But sometimes I do indeed completely make stuff up. (Did you already see #2?)

4- When cashiers ask me how I am I like to offer answers other than “Fine.” So, depending on my mood, I may reply “I’m not sure. How do I look?” or “Practically perfect!” or “Buffeted by the raging storms of my inner angst. You?” Sometimes they’re so rattled they give me back too much change. I always return the extra.

5- Even though I’ve spent a goodly portion of my life trying to establish myself as a professional writer (and succeeding on a small level), I still give away my (mostly) weekly, (sometimes) hilarious (okay, amusing) emailed newsletter/column. At first my motives were crassly commercial. I figured it would help me sell an extra few books. Now I do it because enough people have told me how much they look forward to it that I don’t want to disappoint them. Plus it’s still fun. Plus, sooner or later I’m going to publish more books and they’ll feel obligated to buy them. Bwahahahaaaaa!

Bonus weirdness!

6- If I feel out of sync with the universe I’ll do something different in order to plug back into its rhythm. I might walk backwards for a while or put my jeans on before my socks or maybe bend a meme rule or two. What can I say? I’m a rebel without a pause. Or maybe without applause. Whatever....

15 comments:

Othmar Vohringer said...

As the saying goes it takes all sorts of people to make the world go round.

I would love to see the faces of cashiers in responce to your answer. If they give me back to much money I would keep it. What can I say; I love money and money loves me too. :-)

Mark Pettus said...

Question about #2. Do you ever get lucky after rubbing someone's bum? I think it might have worked for me in college, but I'm not sure I'm brave enough to find out if it still works.

Frank Baron said...

Othmar - the usual response is an uncertain smile and a small backwards step (there's not a lot of space in those cashier cage-things).

Mark - I need to be pretty darn selective with the bum rubs. Unless I decide one day that face-slaps are lucky....

Joanne said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Joanne said...

Frank, you never fail to make me laugh. Good list of weird habits! Thanks for joining in.

Othmar Vohringer said...

I guess they worry what a weird guy like you might do to them. He, He.

I have been taged too, I had to think so hard to come up with something that I got a headache because I am definitely not weird, but there are a lot of people around me that are very, very weird. ;)

Othmar aka huntwriter

mogie222 said...

Freak.

Wait, you've published a book?

;-)

Anne C. Watkins said...

Um, great list, Frank. I'm afraid to share mine! lol

Frank Baron said...

Thanks Joanne. I'm not surprised you have a superb sense of humour to go along with the good looks, intelligence and terrific writing ability. Oh, and you're darned perceptive too. :)

Othmar, I'll check your list. Looking forward to reading someone as non-weird as I am.

Mog... :P

Anne, you can do it. Just leave out that embarrassing thing you do with the birds, the candle wax and the hula hoop.

Joanne said...

Hey, Frank. Speaking of your faithful column readers, the last one I received was in November # 102. Surely, you've had several out since then. :(

Frank Baron said...

Ack Joanne! It was around then that my browser crashed and I lost many of my subscriber's addies. I thought I'd recovered them all but I guess not.

I'll send you a PM on the boards and you can tell me which addy you'd like me to use to add you.

Joanne said...

Yay! Where's that jumping smilies when you need it. I have bedtime reading material again! Woo hoo!

ohdawno said...

How come wanting to wear my Christmas sweaters and Mac's hat isn't weird?

I shall await a response...

Frank Baron said...

Glad you're back on board Joanne. :)

Dawno, the answer to your question is simple: I am not weird, therefore it follows that wanting to wear your Christmas sweaters and Mac's hat cannot be classified as weird behaviour.

Glad I could clear that up. :)

Ray Wong said...

rub a duck bum...